I emailed him last freaking thursday. That was six days ago.
I made a mistake though, and emailed him again. Last night. At his quasi-work email account, so I know he got it. It didn't say anything; just that I wondered if he had gotten my previous email and that if he wanted to talk he should let me know when a good time would be. Now I just look freaking pathetic. And I've made myself vulnerable. I feel like a complete moron.
Honestly, I am absolutely stunned that I haven't heard back from him. Three weeks ago, he was asking about the status of "you and me" and wanted to be my friend. Now he won't even email me back? I am SO confused by this. This is the kind of guy behavior that drives normally rational people like me to become stalkers. I'd like to think he has been in a tragic motorcycle accident and is in a body cast somewhere, unable to call or check his email, wondering if I am thinking about him. But no, these things don't really happen. Except in fairy tales and on tv. Besides, I would have heard about a gory motorcycle accident.
Now I am obsessively checking my email, waiting for a message from him. And I'm starting to get really, really mad.
So, but, here's the deal. I don't want him back. I honestly don't. I want him to want me back, but that's really irrelevant. What I want is to talk to him, or see him, and put the final nail in the relationship coffin. Some would call this "closure" but I hate that term. But, maybe that's what it is. I'm tired of waiting to feel better and I want to get on with my life, and I want to start dating again, but I can't until this is finally, finally over.
And he once again has the upper hand. Because I am pathetic. :(