Saturday, August 16, 2008

Another Morning After

You knew it was going to happen.  I wanted it to happen.  He wanted it to happen.  So it happened.

I slept with BB last night.  This time with the sex.  Twice.  And a half.  It was wonderful.  I have no regrets.  I have no weird feelings.  Well, except for the fact that its been 5 months, so certain parts of my anatomy feel a bit weird.

(too much information, right?  Come on!  Its the first time I've ever blogged about having sex!)

I frustrated the hell out of him though, and rightfully so.  We hung out last night after I was done helping my dad.  We made no pretenses of trying to go out - he asked what I wanted to do and my reply was "sit on the couch and drink beer."  I knew what that really meant, and he did too, but for a while, I really thought about having a couple beers and heading home.  And told him so, several times.  It made him distressed.  Good.  

I slept like a baby.  Woke up a bunch (owing to my tiny bladder and the beers I drank), but when I was asleep, it was a deep, deep sleep.  The kind of sleep that only happens when you are being spooned by a giant hairy man.  It must have done me good because I made no protests when he woke me up at 5:30 am.  5:30!  I had to get up at 6 anyway, so, whatever.

Part of me has wondered whether I might have done it just to create some drama to blog about, but really, I don't think that's it.  I don't know why this is happening, and I really have no idea why I don't feel bad about letting it happen.  But, fact is, I know where I stand.  I know where he stands.  When it starts causing me stress, I'm going to stop.  When it starts interfering with my real life, I'm going to stop.  I'm still going to date, if the opportunity arises.  But he's not, because he simply won't have the time for the next month.  Its not a bad situation to be in really.  

I hear you judging me!  Quit it.  It spoils all my fun!

1 comment:

Katy said...

Well duh. We all knew it was going to happen. Bottom line is that you need to do what is going to make you happy. If he can be selfish so can you. And, I must agree...spooning with a big, hairy guy is definitely the best sleep ever.