Friday, September 5, 2008

First Date, again

I have never really figured out how to tackle the first date.  I suppose there probably isn't really a perfect answer, particularly when you've never actually met the person.  Meeting for dinner stinks for lots of reasons, meeting for drinks is almost as bad because I don't have the distraction of jamming food in my face.  I much prefer the activity date, but you run the risk of messing up your hair, getting sweaty, smelling bad, and getting covered in mud.  

You also run the risk of getting carried away by the scenery.  


This was where I had my first date with eHarmony David, or ED as he will now be known (its easier to type).  We met in a small town about an hour from my house.  Yes, an hour.  It was only worth making the drive because we were going to paddle.  He brought his canoe, I brought my kayak.  He was about ten minutes late.  I get the feeling that ED hasn't owned a watch in a really long time.

When he got out of his car, my first thought was "Oh no.  He's really little.  That blows."  And, his voice was still a bit high, although not as high as it sounded on the phone.  I had a sinking feeling that it was going to be a long afternoon.  I really need to learn to not be so judgmental.  Maybe I also need to learn to love guys that don't resemble a Sasquatch.

The kayak/canoe trip was more complicated that I had envisioned - I thought we were going to throw the boats in the water, paddle a little loop and come back to the same spot, then get a beer and get the hell out of there.  Uh-uh.  He had a trip all mapped out, one that involved taking a car to the put in, paddling downstream, then taking a car back up to rescue the first car and leaving the boats behind until we got back.  Yeah, yeah, I know, all details you really don't care about.  But what you should care about is that I met this guy, looked at map, strapped my kayak on his car, got in his car, and drove deep into the woods.  With a perfect stranger.

I had checked him out though.  I knew where he worked.  I knew people he worked with.  I had a pretty good feeling that nothing bad was going to happen to me.  Good thing I didn't know he had a machette with him (all good boy scout types carry knives on the water in case of emergency).  

After some work, we finally got both boats in the water.  He immediately impressed me with his canoe skills.  He was much more nimble in his boat than I was in my kayak and I found that hard to swallow (I hate canoes.  Unless the canoe has a big cooler of beer in it.).  He kinda left me alone for a bit and we both explored the water - we were in a rocky section with lots of fun little things to paddle through and clear water so you could look down and see fish.  Then we started talking a bit more as we headed down river. 

We talked about a lot of stuff.  Stuff I normally wouldn't talk about on a first date.  We shared our respective eHarmony and Match experiences, which were completely opposite.  He prefers the eHarmony system - he thinks it is really giving him compatible matches.  I expressed my deep frustration with the way eHarmony works, and talked about how much more I liked Match.  But, let's face it.  Two single people who have been internet dating for years were comparing the merits of the two biggest online dating sites - clearly, its not working for either of us!

Poor sweet thing, he also thought that once a girl went on one or two internet dates, she stopped talking about it to her friends.  Where on earth would he get an idea like that?!  I almost fell out of my boat laughing.  It was all I could do to stop myself from telling him that I routinely blog about my dating experiences so that my friends (and internet strangers) could live vicariously through my sad little dating life.  But, he definitely learned how wrong his theory was when he called me on the way home and I was on a three-way call with my girlfriends so I only had to tell my date story once...  (well, once that night.  I must have told it 12 times this week already!)

Anyway, as we paddled we shared stories about work, our friends, vacations, and philosophized about life in general.  He really is a very interesting guy and his take on life is generally pretty compatible with my own.  It was dark before we got back to the boat launch -  the trip definitely should not have taken that long.  I think we were both just taking our time and enjoying the company.  

It was nearly 10pm by the time we had taken care of getting his car and strapping the boats back on their respective cars.  I met him at 4:15.  Oh, but we weren't done yet!  We desperately needed food, and I desperately needed a beer.  Do you know how difficult it is to find a place that is still serving food on a Sunday night in small town America?  We eventually found one whose kitchen was closing in "4 minutes."  Thank god they had a veggie panini on the menu.

We sat at the bar and downed some beers, and inhaled some food.  I think the panini was kind of gross actually, but I didn't stop to think about it.  He entertained me with stories about his graduate work on the breeding behavior of birds.  No, no, don't yawn.  There are truly some fascinating parallels between female bird behavior towards male birds with high testosterone levels and female humans towards male humans with bad attitudes and sports cars.  

We closed the bar - they were sweeping around us and giving us nasty little looks.  We got out of there around midnight, pretty damn close to 8 hours after our date had started.  He hugged me (thank god he didn't try to kiss me) and asked if I wanted to do it again.  I said yes, but it was a bit unenthusiastic.  He may have picked up on that.  How could I be so unenthusiastic about a guy who had kept me amused for 8 hours?  He's not a Sasquatch.  He lives really far away.  He's not quite as easy-going as I am...

And I'm still sleeping with BB....

I really don't know whether BB is affecting my feelings on the ED situation.  I mean, obviously, it has to have some impact, but with or without the BB situation, ED is definitely not my physical type.  But he is my intellectual type.  And that's why I will go out with him again.  I'd like to try getting to know someone slowly.  For a change.


kristen said...

"I really don't know whether BB is affecting my feelings on the ED situation."

did you even partially believe yourself when you wrote that??? i mean, i couldnt even keep a straight face while reading it!

Susan said...

Yes, of course I believe myself! Honestly, with or without BB I definitely would not be swooning over this guy. But, I might not have night terrors about the thought of him kissing me.

Aren't you supposed to be packing!? I know its more fun to call me out, but get to work!