Saturday, September 20, 2008

I need to move...

Yes, its saturday night and I'm blogging.  Worse yet, it is saturday night and I'm doing homework for my economics class.  Its so boring and pointless that my mind started wandering and I thought to myself "I wonder what's hanging out on Match.com these days?"

See, I know myself.  And I know that without a constant stream of boys to daydream about, I am going to get really bored, really fast.  And with darkness setting in at around 7pm and fall closing in on me, there is a small part of me that thinks its time to find a boy to snuggle with all winter.  A new one.  

But here is what I'm up against:

Smith, from the town adjacent to mine had the following very insightful things to say about the type of girl he is looking for and his views on relationships: 

"aggressive male looking for a girl who is 1. employed, 2. not bossy, demanding, superficial and does not talk incessantly, 3. is on the pretty side, 4. is not morbidly obese or excessively skinny, and 5. does not have red hair.  An appreciation of the NFL is a plus, but at minimum must not complain about being neglected during football season."

I wonder what exactly he was thinking when he chose to describe himself as an "aggressive male?"  Also, under the "for fun" category he says "watching football on tv, fantasy football and football."  The last thing he read was Football Digest.  Also, his favorite things are football (no way!).  And cats (huh?).  And guess what?  He has no picture.  What do you bet that even though he doesn't want his girl to be an obese red-head, he wears size 3XL and has a thick head of frizzy red hair?  I'm half tempted to sign up and email him, just to be a total bitch.  

But Smith is nothing compared to this little jem from Cake, who lives in the same town my buddy Smith does: im a down to earth 34 year old man i love hunting nascar just about all sports i have a 15 year old son thats big into sports i love the outside im looking for someone who might go huntig fihing 4 whilling or go out on the boat crabbing with me.

Wow.  Welcome to my future...

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