It comes in a red package that features a sailboat. Its not out of the question that my father used it, or, maybe it was my grandfather. It may have come in a soap on a rope product in the 80's. There is nothing cool or suave about Old Spice (or any variety of soap on a rope). Nothing. Nada.
Why does it matter? Why am I wasting your time with my thoughts on men's toiletries?
Because I want to wrap myself up in a stick of it and stay there forever. I want to swim in a pool of it. I want to roll my kayak in it. It makes me melt. It makes me want to do things like bake brownies, from scratch, and iron shirts. In my bare-feet. Maybe pregnant.
(believe it or not, I haven't even been drinking.)
Old Spice is the scent of BB. That, and that dryer sheets with the teddy (Snuggle?). Its a powerful combination. During those months that I was holding on to his stuff, I would occasionally walk by his bag and get a whiff of it. Then be drawn in, and do pathetic things like deeply inhale his shirt. Pathetic. But I wonder, which came first? My fascination with BB, or my fascination with old-man deodorant? Did his Old Spice smell help draw me in? Or do I now love that smell because I associate it with him, and not necessarily because I like it. Please let it not be that I'm just a sucker for Old Spice. What if I am? I could wind up with a total (bigger) jackass, just because he uses cheap old-man deodorant. Damn you, Proctor and Gamble!!! Damn you!!!
2 comments:
Now I know why you have the hots for my hubby (besides the fact that he's hot)....old spice deodorant. If I catch you sniffing his armpits, it will freak me out. But if sniffing his armpits keeps you away from BB, I'm ok with that. See what a REAL friend is!
It has to be some sort of pheromone thing.
It's like crack for your nose... oh wait... that doesn't work...
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