Tuesday, December 9, 2008

The Numbers Game

I have a friend.  This friend and I are pretty competitive people - so competitive that several years ago, for some reason (boredom) we started a competition of sorts.  I've been ahead for several years, but she has finally caught up, owing to the fact that I've stayed on the same number for way too long.  I can't let her get ahead.  I'm going to have to add a number.  Fairly soon.  

What the hell am I talking about?  Our number!  You know.... (ahem) number of partners!

My number (and hers) is pretty low in the grand scheme of things.  On average, its less than one a year since I started having sex.  I was ecstatic when I hit double digits.  Ecstatic!  I felt like I had finally reached womanhood.  I was no longer embarrassed of my number, like I was when I was 27 years old and the number was 3 (yikes!).  It blew me away when I pulled ahead in the numbers game though, because I'm not the one known for making out in the corner of bars with perfect strangers (although, I'm not saying its never happened, its just not routine). I guess I got pretty good at whoring myself out on the internet though; good enough to make up for a little lost time and pull ahead.  

(By the way, we are talking purely about quantity - not quality.  Friend would be way ahead of me if we were assigning quality points to our encounters.  Way ahead.  Way.)

And here's how you know that your friends truly love you: when a factor in her decision to add a number (albeit a very, very, very, very small part of the factor) is to challenge you to get you off your ass and add a number; which would mean moving on...


Ms Behaviour said...

Wow, double digits! Hmmm... I may have to start my own competition!

Elena said...

Yay! I agree with "friend". If not for anything else, to make your blog more interesting... :)

Susan said...

Really?!? You are encouraging me to participate in risky sexual behaviors for your entertainment?! Bad friend.